Toxic Waste

The days were passing easily. I may not have been spending them the way I wished to, but I was content. Now, why now? A simple thread of thoughts leads to something more: that ache inside my chest ebbs throughout my body. The pain remains, it was caught within the cavity of my chest only until these thoughts ripped to set it free.

Why am I incapable of keeping this toxic waste from coating my life? A four letter word spells the answer to this question that perhaps ought to remain rhetoric.

Only a few days, memories of this feeling had begun to slip. Now, the feeling burns strong, creating new memories, vivid and uncomfortable.

It leaves and at times, I barely acknowledge its absence, while during others, I bask in relief. I certainly know of its return, though. A thick sadness that drapes itself over my shoulders and my heart.